“We are only angels with one wing, we can only fly embraced.” (Luciano De Crescenzo)
Maybe until the pandemic I would have passed this quote with distance, coldness, some cynicism, specific to people who lived quite a long time alone, took some lessons and are afraid to take risks.
Perhaps many find themselves in this situation; but some do not even admit it to themselves, unfortunately.
We have learned to be independent, to do everything by ourselves, we have nurtured this belief that we can do whatever we want, when we want, that even the winter holidays can pass easily. We ‘self-educated’ to have a good time with ourselves that we became like Procust, the one who walked with the bed after him and cut the others to the size of that bed. No one is good enough, we snap out of everything, we no longer know what it means to see the other’s perspective, to understand, to be tolerant, to make compromises, we no longer know how to be with others.
I think a big challenge in and after this pandemic is to learn to be together, after we have learned to be alone.
In a way, society has moved toward individualism. We tended to Western civilization, progress; but it also came with a high level of individualism, selfishness, bundled. It was hard at first, but it became a way of life.
In difficult times, however, people survived together, not in isolation.
Learning to be together requires a lot of adaptation, understanding, empathy, caring, let things go from time to time, accepting that the relationship is above personal pride, that we do not take our toys and leave altogether. Common language occurs when each makes an effort to understand the other.
Together it means not to pass by, like two trains, one next to the other, not to be in the situation to see but not to understand what we are. The idea of ‘together’ is not just to make myself understood but to understand you.
This ‘together’ can be related to personal relationships but also to work. A group of people will become a team when they have common goals, they share the same values. It’s hard to take the step from the famous ‘I, I, I’ to ‘We’. As comfortable and ‘safe’ as it may seem to be just us, in our minds, at some point we have nowhere to grow. We will survive and develop in interaction with others, in a group, protected by others. Otherwise, the dangers can be of many kinds.