“What a beautiful day today!” That’s what my mother said to me after I spent a couple of hours in her yard on Sunday.
Sure enough, she made some food for me, as she does every weekend when I go out there. But what she loved was that we spent most of that time making together…. crossword puzzles! Looking up words together, making jokes at her or my expense, refusing to look at the end to see the answers, laughing.
The day before, we’d gone out for lunch, shopping, got her a little present.
But it seems that Sunday was more rewarding.
Maybe, after all, it doesn’t matter that we get things, that we eat something different, it’s like we’re half actors, half spectators in our own lives. We enjoy ourselves, for sure, in such contexts too.
What matters more is how we feel, how involved we are in what we do. The quality of time spent with others, the reminiscing over coffee at the kettle, like in the old days, the jokes, the laughing to tears, in the courtyard, in the sunshine, the feeling of ‘togetherness’, especially for someone who has been alone for many years, like my mother, all give us energy, fresh air, inspiration, create emotional anchors that nourish us more than anything else.
Time spent with someone, no phone, no distractions, is a bigger investment than we think. Our availability for such moments is low, we get caught in the triangle the French call ‘metro – boulot – dodo’ (metro – job – sleep) and forget that other things matter, perhaps more than anything else.
When is the last time you thought ‘What a beautiful day it’s been today!’?