In our pursuit of success, of showing who we are, we have come to lose the person who should be our best friend: ourselves.

We befriend many people on social media, we display certain aspects of ourselves, the beautiful ones, as if our lives were lived to the highest standards. However, behind the screen, in fact, the state of loneliness is very deep, even for those who are part of a group, I dare say.

It is the pursuit of something, maybe a more exciting way of living, something different.

Why? Because, often, we do not have inner support; everything is on the outside – what is fashionable, what we should wear; it is all about the general marketing, promoting success models. We steer towards the idea of social success but our being stays behind. We align with strategies, performance objectives, with social media, with IT&C development, but we suffer from feelings of inadequacy.

There are also people who reach (or not) a form of social success, but who feel well and who do not get bored with themselves; they have good relations with others as they do not expect others to make them happy.

Actually, if we think about it carefully and realistically, only we can make ourselves happy. Waiting for someone to make us happy means laying out a path for dissatisfaction, disappointment, frustration.

I attended an annual group meeting at Instead – we all graduated the EMCCC (Executive Master in Coaching and Consulting for Change). Those people have various leading positions or are entrepreneurs who come from different countries – Brazil, the USA, India, Abu Dhabi and some European countries. No one travels that far to talk about politics, sport, fashion or the weather. Instead we talk about personal preoccupations that no one knows about, about our most hidden fears, thoughts, dilemmas. Some say: ‘Only you and my wife know this’; others say that they have not talked to anyone about a certain subject. However, we all have the need to be listened to, to be understood, supported, accepted. We are loners who come together, stick together, from time to time, and form a group. This is a group where members accept one another as they are, do not judge one another, but support one another, energize one another. They are, like many others, the beautiful loners of the large cities.