”Have you ever said any of these phrases to yourself:

I’m not good/good enough
I don’t (can’t) swim / dance / speak languages
I’m too old / young for this
I can’t, what will people say?
Better with the devil you know, than with the devil you don’t know
Nobody cares about me
I don’t have enough time
I can, I don’t need nobody

Probably yes, most of us have beliefs that can work like obstacles, limit you.

What are limiting beliefs?

Limiting beliefs are those beliefs of ours that prevent us from achieving our goals, our desires, our full potential. These beliefs can cause us not to enter into a relationship, not to approach someone, not to leave a relationship, not to look for a job where we will be comfortable, not to assert ourselves, hold a point of view.

What we can do to ‘limit’ the impact of limiting beliefs?

It’s not easy to get past these limiting beliefs. First, it’s important to acknowledge them, to be aware that we have them.
Then, to seek to identify what is behind each of these beliefs.
For example, what is behind it: “I’m not good at sports?” Maybe someone, parent, grandparent, teacher, told you that you were no good years ago and you stuck with that belief. Then, what does “I’m no good?” mean? Maybe if we take up tennis at 40, we won’t become like Simona Halep. But with practice, perseverance, discipline, we have a chance to be good.

Another example: I can’t drive a car, I’m anti-talent. Maybe a parent told you this and this statement stuck in your mind, you let it define you. You have a driver’s license, you’ve taken exams to get it, you’ve taken many hours to learn. But somehow, it’s your mother or father’s voice that dominates and you let it tell you that you can’t. What’s more, it seems to have become your voice too.

Another important step is to take this belief outside yourself, to imagine yourself letting go of it, taking it away and putting it outside on the table. You are not that belief. If that belief is just an excuse not to do something, then it’s good to follow Nike’s admonition, “Just do it!”
But if it’s more than that, then don’t hesitate to seek support. A psychotherapist, an experienced coach can guide you.
I would add another idea: put a ‘yet’ to your self-limiting statements:
I can’t yet;
I don’t know yet; I don’t swim/drive/speak English yet.
The goal is to reposition yourself to a situation. If you don’t know English, you can learn, you can take a course. You won’t be reading Shakespeare in the original in a year but you will be able to communicate in the target language.

Mindset is essential. When we tell ourselves we don’t know, we can’t, we don’t trust, we’re not good enough, we stop allowing ourselves to explore alternatives. Our mindset is like caged animals in a circus. They were only allowed to move within a few square meters, they could only make certain movements determined by the confined space.
No one wants to have a mind caged, not allowed to dare, romp, imagine possibilities, make various connections, to think and change its mind.

Sometimes it helps to reflect on ourselves, to stop and consider what makes us happy, what upsets us, what brings out the best or the worst in us, what makes us sad. Meditation helps, if it works for you.

Then let’s try and think more positively. I’m not a fan of positivism at any cost. I prefer to look critically at a situation, to see what works and what doesn’t, to distance myself, and to analyze what can be good and what is bad. But sometimes I recognize that the mind can play tricks on us and screen the bright side of the situation, of someone, of ourselves.

It also helps to talk to ourselves in good times, with empathy, compassion, with love. I like to give this example: think of the child you were; look at a picture of yourself as a toddler/child. Imagine meeting that child and holding him/her in your arms, saying loving words, appreciating, encouraging. That child deserves your appreciation and love, as you would, of course, and probably do, with other people.
That child is you, so speak to him with care, support, encouragement, friendship.

Another idea is to try something new. If you have people around you doing something different from you, explore, ask them to include you. For example, if someone in your circle wants to skydive, go with him/her, maybe the thought of doing something like that yourself will tempt you. Or even go ballooning.☺️

Remember that you have people around you who care about you, who appreciate you, even if they don’t tell you often (or some never). If they didn’t appreciate you, they wouldn’t be your friends, they wouldn’t talk to you. Ask them for help, once in a while. We all need help, we all need others, we don’t live alone in the world, although we may feel that way sometimes.

Put pictures, reminders to reposition yourself in your office, somewhere. I know, it sounds forced, but sometimes we need to make an effort, to have an external stimulus, otherwise we can get overwhelmed and forget to look from the outside at ourselves, at a situation, to think critically, to objectify ourselves.

I invite you to think about the beliefs that limit you and try some of these steps. And if I can help in any way, then email me.”

via: Thrive