That’s what a lot of people say when you give them a gift: ‘There was no need! You should not have!’
The embarrassment you feel when you receive such a reply is perhaps similar to their agitation when they see that someone has done something for them. It doesn’t matter if it’s more or less, if they like it or not, if they unwrapped the package or not. You shouldn’t have bothered!
I don’t think that’s what’s about. When someone gives us a gift, no matter how small, symbolic, the message is that that person has thought of us. That for a while, that person was looking for something that we like, enjoy, surprise, amaze, show us that we are important to him / her.
When someone gives us something, they don’t do it because ‘it was needed’. We are not in a working relationship under communism to receive a long pack of Kent, a packet of ‘good’ coffee and a Fa soap, because ‘that’s how it’s done’. Nowadays, there’s nothing that should be done.
The most precious gift is someone’s time. When someone takes the time to think about what you would like, to go somewhere with you, to ask you how you are doing, to write to you, to talk to you, it means that they value you enough, that the relationship it is not a transactional one. But when we do not know how to appreciate this, the universe takes this gift from us.